Once, a long time ago, I was told by one of the STAINED ARRANGERS that I didn’t know how to communicate. 

I thought about that for a day and decided they might be right. I asked what I should do about this and the STAINED ARRANGER told me I should take a course in effective communication.            I said, “OK.”

What I learned was the I message, YOU message; which is… if you begin a sentence with YOU; YOU are already in trouble because you are assigning blame. If you begin your sentence with I; you are expressing how you feel. 

I had been starting most sentences with you. I gave the course bill to the STAINED ARRANGER to pay. 

” I feel better.”

DENNIS MANTIN