It is cold on the eve of Equinox.

Longest night of this dark year.

The covid turned to Omicron.

The future is far from clear.

I hear screams and shouts in shadows.

See long faces filled with dread.

There’s still praying in the churches.

Where faith and hope are fed.

That time was not wasted.

The wasted one was me.

I was searching for something somewhere.

In a place no one could see.

I know it didn’t look too pretty.

That time you said goodbye.

There was drama and some cursing.

And a lack of reasons why.

That time when I was learning.

About life and this and that.

The path it wasn’t beaten down.

Its just place where I was at.

The sickness came upon us; it spread by air on earth.

The sacrifice was young and old, but not as young as birth.

The whining was like candy, and fingers pointed blame.

The business hired talking points who held no one to shame.

No need to speak to loudly, no emotions fill that need.

Someone has got to profit, even if you call it Greed.

So much more that we can say, maybe not bad as war?

But dead is dead when all is said, even when we search for more.

Dennis Mantin

It is early hours in a new territory with few expectations for measurable change, however here I am at an age that the younger version of me would never dare imagine.

How in the name of the baby Jesus did this happen?

Charles Bukowski wrote that he never met a man he’d rather be and Chuck and I have that in common.

He also stated that it could be delusional thinking; however if this is true then it is a happy and fortunate delusion.

The fever broke mid morning.

After dreams that weren’t so bad.

The toilet held some swets and shakes

But not the worst I ever had.

I think the worst is over.

Only blue skies lie ahead.

Bright smiles from only loving friends.

If I can just now get out of bed.

Something special is mine, is not knowing.

That keeps me in the loop of all of this.

Just a smile shine, all confidence growing.

Give you the scoop now. Ignorance is bliss.

You are something special you! Don’t you ever wanna stop?

You are something special you! You enjoy it there on top.

You are something special you! All that teeth and tissue.

You are something special you! Why oh why you got the blue?

There is something special in not knowing .

Just talking, saw you just the other day.

You suffer so, that cracks are showing.

All that time and love that got away.

You are something special you! Don’t you ever wanna stop?

You are something special you! You enjoy it there on top.

You are something special you! Smile on the masses, all eyes on you.

You are something special you! Please tell me about how you get so blue?

There is no more talk of Santa.

This year she’s all of 10.

Last year it was all about covid.

And now it’s back again.

Now there’s no more Santa.

Old Man is going going gone.

Whenever she asked if you were real.

I said, “Few brighter lights have shone.”

I was awakened this morning by more ‘Hard Hearts’ in this city, screaming and protesting some perceived injustice or other complaint at around 3:30 a.m.

The yelling lasted past 4 at which time the police arrived and did whatever the nightshift does; which eventually led to silence.

I was up by then which triggered my own rigidity and pain that’s now at the mercy of this ungodly urban sprawl that I call home; so far away from my natured youth.

Have you ever been in a negotiation with someone who is mentally ill?

It is the strangest thing I’ve ever encountered.

The stakes are high or I wouldn’t be involved in such discussions…

A friend called just to say hello… no negotiations, just a familiar voice from another time and place and we drifted apart into our own separate cloud of crazy!

It will end with silence.

Not quite sure if I have this right, however; I grew up, taught by a generation who seemed to believe that there were benefits in learning things ‘the hard way.’

They lacked the desire to share the wisdom of their experiences.

“Let him find out the hard way. ”

I heard this often.

Maybe being hardened and conditioned by war does that. Or maybe it was just the lot that I was around as a kid.

Or maybe it was just all me, not wanting to listen and they were just struggling to know how to handle that.

The lines of communication are open between me and my kid and I have no desire for her to face this world, ‘The Hard Way. ‘

For her part, she listens to what I have to say and seems to incorporate that into making up her mind.