She said, “He has absolutely no sex appeal… not a tattoo, nothing. Zero… nothing to offer whatsoever.”

I hadn’t a clue who she was referring to. I just knew it wasn’t me; but still I stared at my Nova Scotia mapped tartan tat to make sure it was still there. I winked at the Vitruvian Man with the head of Homer Simpson and I bit my tongue. Not fucking really, just a figure of speech; cause what I really wanted to say was:

“Who in the name of the baby Jesus is going to show a flirtatious fun sex appeal side of themselves in this environment of political correct victims r us nightmare? Certainly not anyone I know…”

Dennis Mantin