I’ve been living in the Alley.

My best friend is a cat.

There is nothing in the cupboard.

No one is getting fat.

There are moments of sheer terror.

Followed by a deathly calm.

Not much happens in the Alley.

The nights are cool and long.

Only once in my life have I gone to a fortune teller… It was in Vancouver in 1985 which means I was 26.

The Fortune Teller was an Asian man not more than a decade older than me and didn’t offer one piece of fortune telling prophecy.

Instead, what I remember was he told me to take care of myself, take care of my teeth, go to a dentist, eat fruits and vegetables, meditate, get proper rest and things of this nature.

All of it good advice however at the time I felt ripped off because I was expecting something different.

In hindsight what he was telling me was, “Don’t be afraid to invest in yourself… Which is about the best advice I’ve ever received.

Their smiles came so easy. I was awestruck… just amazed!

To wonder what it must be like to feel that unfazed.

To grow up with a knowing trust; that you’ll never be let down.

That someone’s looking out for you, and is here and not left town.

I felt I shouldn’t warn them of their fates, I’m sure will come.

Cause I kinda like their happy talk, You know it really works for some.

So I smiled insincerely, tried it on, felt like a fool.

I’ll just stick to what I know, in the deep end of the pool.

My friend she was smiling.

We got stuck with the filing.

Another job, she always loathed.

She said, “Can’t you get with the times?’

I said I make contemporary rhymes.

Where the Emporeress is still clothed.

And then time becomes memory.

Fade away here like luxury.

I’m lost here. Is it just me?

Fading like waves to a sea.

And my friend, she is naked.

A bad habit, she can’t break it.

Another job I never loathed.

Changing lamps for the surgery.

To see inside. Only away from me.

And the Emporeress is not clothed.

And then the times become memory.

Fades away here like luxury.

I’m lost here. Is it just me?

Fading away like waves to a sea.

Think I will stay just where I am.

Another man without a plan.

Another job I always loathed.

Changing lamps for the surgery.

To see inside just away from me.

And the Emperoress is still not clothed.

And time becomes memory.

Fading away here like luxury.

I’m lost here. Is it just me?

Fading away like waves to the sea.

Back at work, post covid. Not everyone has returned.

It is quieter now. The voices in my heart are not as loud.

I have vowed to be less expressive.

Time to step aside and let go.

Acceptance is the key.

The rains here in April are in full bloom, and my energy has returned. I am listening, and adjustments are all the rage.

I feel like I’ve missed something, and I’m far from alone, and that maybe we all might not be as informed as we think we are??

Wicked Wanda’s telling stories and none of them are true.

She has her Heroes riled up and they’re coming for me and you.

Now I can’t say I’m worried because I’ve dealt with this before.

You see I knew her older sister and her Mother I adore.

But for you I’d make provisions, set affairs and say goodbyes.

When Wanda’s on the war path, there’s no running from those lies.

The problem is not that you lied. The problem is that I can’t trust you again… The problem is that I held you above the masses.

Now you are just among the herd, grazing, shitting, complaining; or whatever it is your lot does down there.

All over but the dying.

I can hear a distant roar.

I’ve resigned my fears of flying.

Oh the mysteries! Why? What for?

All too clever for the answers.

We keep searching for more clues.

Dodging earthquakes, fame and cancers.

There is meaning in ‘The Blue’s.’

Never felt like I was welcomed.

I was strange and stranger still.

Like a begger at the banquet feast.

I just couldn’t get my fill.

All those important things that I used to focus on…

Sports scores.

Getting high.

The drunken dances where I didn’t dance.

The partying!

Was it all a waste of time?

Certainly not!

All part of the journey…

I was a boy when people asked me…

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

‘Unafraid.’ I thought.

“I don’t know.” I answered.

I just wanted people to stop hitting me. I just didn’t want to be afraid all the time.

I grew tall and people asked me.

“Why are you so angry?”

“Why do you drink so much?”

“I don’t know. ” I lied.

I am 58 years old and I am a father and I know what I want. To teach her and show her love and support her and be her friend… and paint and make films.

“I will tell story.”

Said I.

Dennis Mantin