There is a heart shaped carve in rosewood.
There’s a line drawn in the sand.
I pray there on grace and wonder,
and there’s a baby, she’s in my hand.

There’s a virtue called forgiveness.
From a force we can’t see.
It’s how I deal with darkness.
Of how I feel when you’re with me.

I struggle now to hear you.
Seek approval in your eyes.
I hate you for your beauty.
Like I love you for your lies.

It’s a sad sad situation
Department sad but true.
You fear that they are coming
And you fear what they will do.

It’s a sad sad situation
Under heading sad but true
You fear that they are coming
No one is coming for you.

Dennis Mantin

I don’t know why my baby lovesj clowns.
Whose painted on tears never fall down.
I don’t know what she sees in their eyes
Perhaps the line between horror/surprise…

I don’t know why my baby can’t sing.
Why carnival music isn’t her thing.
It fills my head when I’m at the fair.
Searching for clues in clowns everywhere.

I don’t know why she screams at night.
I hope it’s not why she holds me so tight.
Because I’m the type I’m weak for love.
Carnival music I rise above.

Is it the pain or is it the tears?
For some carnival crime from yesteryears.
Maybe it’s you, maybe I’ll never know.
Maybe it’s me, baby let go.

(chorus)

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings horses and all the kings men.
Tried and they tried but she fell down again.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
She went to her shrink ended up at the mall.
Humpty Dumpty wanted it all.

Dennis Mantin

(A song I wrote about leaving high school)

Chances were the premium at the chances store.
Called up their proprietor and asked for just one more.
Inside information suggested relocate
When they closed the chances store it sealed the users fate.

With no plans for the future and the future it is here.
Who knew that the sun would rise and whisper last nights fear?
So we headed for the highway which ended at the light.
Looked upon arrival, no chances store in sight.

Searching for the answers that will ease the fears.
Some will stand there crying and find few are buying tears.
All are someone’s baby lost along the way.
Strangers and sojourners who have lost the need to pray.

And I say, “Pray”

Get down on your knees sweet Charlotte , get down on your knees.
I know you have a mission and I hope it is to please.
Take me to your leader because I think I’ve found the cure.
It’s a love that is botanical with determination pure.

Dennis Mantin

I have watched you over the years…

Slowly steadily losing your humanity.

Hardening to the core in the midst of struggle.

Do you see it in yourself?

The pain and loss, devouring anything resembling compassion; all the while preaching to anyone who will listen to the plight of your righteous victimhood.

Are you alone now?

Good.

Now we can begin.

Hold up the mirror…

Watching

Waiting

Sometimes the distance of silence is enough. Oftentimes I don’t even think about the past. It is just easier to shut up or smile and wave. “Gotsta go…Bye bye now. Have a lovely day.”

The second half of my life is being spent breaking the habits I acquired in the first half…

It’s been 17 plus years since I drank alcohol did drugs, or smoked cigarettes…

I haven’t dated in 10 years…

Keeping my opinions to myself has not gone as well…

Still a work in progress.

I’ve sarcastically called her the ‘Gift that keeps on taking’, however she is the ‘Gift that keeps on giving.’.

Keeping life interesting and her unpredictability always leaves me wondering… What’s next?

I never know; however I do know it will be financially expensive and involve far too many people and opinions.

I also know I will be cast as the villan and she of course will be in possession of yet another tale of victimhood.

Stop fighting this and just accept the gifts as they come. Carl Jung said it is the struggles we will remember most in the end.

Enjoying the ride as always. It’s the Powerlessness and freedom to choose how I react to chaos that are the most addictive.

Maybe I haven’t said ‘Thank You’ enough. In that case “Thank you!”